Dysphoria
by zithara
Summary: Ness reveals a well-kept secret to Paula in hopes she can help him. T for some uncomfortable themes. Oneshot.


"Paula..."  
A desperate whisper stirred the name's owner to the brink of consciousness. She gently clutched the musty hotel comforter tighter to her, assuming the noise came from outside and was not meant for her. She was vaguely aware of an encroaching emptiness behind her, where her friend usually slept, but chose to ignore it and slip back into sleep.  
"Paula!"  
This time, the whisper was accompanied by a light shake. Paula's eyes fluttered open, and she rubbed at them blearily. She half sat up, her eyes still stubbornly shut. "Mmm?" she mumbled vaguely.  
"Paula, wake up". The voice belonged to Ness, who was awkwardly crouching beside the bed.  
Recognizing the upset in his face, Paula's eyes focused and she hurriedly began stepping out of bed. "Ness, what is it?" she urgently whispered, glancing frantically throughout the room for some sort of terror- be it monster, alien, or drunken old man. But it was a quiet night, nothing pervaded the silent room but a chill night air and the distant sound of a train. Her eyes came to rest on the softly sleeping forms of Jeff and Poo, before she turned back to the crouched Ness. "Are you homesick?" she asked gently.  
Ness's face scrunched up, and he went red. "No!" Then he paused, looked at the ground, then out the window. "I- I need your help, I..." He gritted his teeth. "I have a problem." he mumbled, almost inaudibly.  
Paula stared at him, a bit perplexed, but not entirely surprised. Ness had a tendency to hide most of his problems, despite wearing his emotions on his sleeve. She was used to being left to guess as to what the newest issue was. "Hungry? Sick?" she crouched down and lazily put an arm around him. "Have a bad dream?" she suggested after a little thought.  
Ness was indignant, and leaned away from her. "No! -I mean, I..." He put his face in his hands. "I can't believe how hard this is!" he hissed, mostly to himself.  
Paula's eyebrows rose, and she blushed slightly, despite herself. She wondered vaguely whether he could, perhaps, _like _her, and if, perhaps, this was his strange way of going about confessing his feelings to her. She tried to gauge what her reaction would hypothetically be to such a confession- did _she _like _him? _She was not sure, and thought maybe they should stay friends for a while, after all- they were young, and very busy with saving the world. Still... he was always there for her, and would lean against her when he felt homesick, and-  
"I think my period just started". Ness whimpered, eyes filled with tears.  
Paula was snapped out of her thoughts. "What?" she asked, certain she had heard incorrectly.  
"My period- I- I think..." Ness slumped over, burrowing his head in his arms once again. He sniffled slightly.  
"...oh." Paula managed after a moment.  
Ness laughed weakly. "I guess I forgot, I mean, I've been a boy since I was 6, and my whole family caught on to it, and I just... I kinda didn't think about..." he began to cry again. "I don't know what to do, I don't have anything, I-"  
Paula interrupted him with a quick hug. "I've got just the thing."

If there was one thing Paula was good at, it was handling confusing, sudden, and embarrassing situations. She worked at a preschool, after all- a boy having a period paled in comparison to the horrors committed by the 3 year olds in her care. She dragged out her suitcase from under the bed, and unzipped it. Ness's eyes widened as she dug through a small pocket in the bag.  
"You should probably take a pad if you're going to go back to sleep," she stated objectively, retrieving one and placing it gently into Ness's hand. "Tampons are nice during the day though, you can forget all about your period for hours on end, if you'd like. You can take some from my bag when you need them during this trip."

Ness nodded dumbly, not having expected such a straightforward response from his friend. Paula began to close her bag, when a thought occurred to her. "Do you have cramps?" she whispered. Ness blinked rapidly, then shook his head slightly, still mute. She re-opened her bag anyway, and produced a small bottle. "If you _do _have cramps, and don't want to risk using PSI on them, you're welcome to my pain-killers as well."  
Paula carefully re-arranged her bag and slid it back under the bed. A breeze drifted lazily through the open window, a cool breath on the two young teens' faces. "If you need any help, just ask, ok?" Paula said softly. There was no answer. Ness's lip was quivering slightly, and he stared silently at the pad in his hand. There was no sound once the breeze died down, even the crickets were silent that night. Paula tentatively placed a hand on Ness's shoulder, and looked worriedly at his face. He continued to stare at the floor.  
"Thanks," Ness finally muttered in a deadened tone. Really, he just wanted to escape the whole thing, escape the body he had been born with, not be seen as a freak by anyone. Especially not by... he woefully looked at Paula, pretty, sweet, supportive Paula, and sighed. With an averted gaze, he began to skulk off towards the bathroom in defeat.  
"Hey," Paula called after him. He turned, sheepishly, with a hot blush on his cheeks and a frown on his lips. She hesitated, not sure exactly what to say. "You pass really well." she said, with a small smile. Ness shrugged noncommittally, and the door shut behind him with a small but definite _click._  
Paula stared at the door for a moment. Her face still felt hot with surprise and embarrassment, entirely for herself and her selfish and utterly incorrect guesses as to what had been bothering her friend. She cared deeply about her friend, and hoped she could help him through this. She hoped he didn't think she thought of him any less for it. She loved spending time with him, she loved helping him, and, for better or for worse, she just plan loved _him_. He was Ness, and this did not change that fact in the slightest, and so she would continue to adore him.  
She shook her head of these thoughts, and yawned. It was the middle of the night, and they had a long way ahead of them tomorrow. She crawled back under the musty covers, soothed by the cold evening, and listened to another distant, ghostly wail as a train passed by. Exhaustion found her once again, and she began drifting back to sleep. At the edge of unconsciousness, Paula felt a familiar someone get into bed behind her, and she lazily rolled over and curled up into the newcomer.  
"You're the cutest boy I know" she said quietly, only partially awake. Ness wrapped an arm around her, and sighed into her hair.  
"Thanks." he said, smiling for the first time that night. The two drifted off to sleep.


End file.
